Friday, February 25, 2005

RRRRRamonov

Ladies and half-ladies, if you are not yet familiar with these pages, let me tell you again. There are odd days in the month when the moon glows in a ubiquitous shade of chartreuse and I suddenly transform into one of the multiple personalities. I, I, I, transform into this lean, mean, and pink blogging machine.

Last Saturday was a Fuschia Letter day. Let me expound. E pano ba naman, my gurrlfriend Toshi (ang nag iisang Black Haponesang Becky) invited me to a rendezvous with his office pals. Of corz, mega pa important muna ako, syempre its not like they're the only ones I'm gonna see that one fine Saturday night. May nagkipag set ng date sakin. Pero sabi nga ni Becky Paulo: "Ligwak! Next in line please!". Physically, he's ok, but verbally no! Let's just say mas gusto ko pang magkaroon ng dialogue with Mahal and Mura kesa sa kanya. Wa talaga ako maintindihan sa sinasabi niya. At first akala ko, I forgot to clean my ears lang, but no! Sabi nga ni Ate Vi "Its not my problem anymore! Its his problem anymore! ahahaha.

So anyway, I just wanted to get the horrendous date over with. I SMSed (o diba, SMS daw o? Ang chaki kasi pakinggan ng "texted" for me e) Toshi and asked him where they are. Sabi niya asa Pizza Hut daw siya with Mama Jing (ang babaeng bakla ng taon) so I rushed my fine piece of ass to Glorietta. Buti na lang pinapasok pa ko ng ng guardiya. Heller? Mukha bang may dala akong bomba? So once inside, Toshi dropped a bomb on me. "O, ayan, dahil loves kita, niyaya ko ang gwapong gwapong si Mon mo".(see this) I was like, "Ok ka lang, taong maitim, Mon ko ka jan? Hindi kaya!". (Pero somewhere in the deep recesses of my pants, pumapalakpak ang Golden Clam ko).

So from one palpak na date, to an award winning one. We met up with Mon at Greenbelt 3, where we (actually, mostly si Toshi lang nag decide, na halos ipagtulakan kami) ate at MYLK. We all tried Ostrich meat. Oh, diba? Fear Factor na hindi? Ok naman kasi siya. At contrary to popular belief, hindi sya mabalahibo (naman! ano sa palagay nyo un, piggy?). Masarap siya, believe you, me.

Ayun, pagkatapos ay nagkayayaan manood ng Constantine, and me being the only Keanu-averse person in the group, I was outvoted. Kasi naman, Keanu and acting is an oxymoron for me. But since this is a semi-suspense flick, I figured he'd be making one dramatic pose after the other lang naman so what the heck? And how right I was. Well at least diba? Movie moments kami. heheh.

After the movie, merong nag SMS (HA!) kay Toshi ulit, and it was his friend Kervin (whom they all refer to as Ms. Venezuela, due to his inhuman height). Hay, ok na sana ang gabi, nadagdagan pa ng prima donna. Andyan na nga si Toshi e. Feeling ko tuloy mala Phantom Of the Opera kami, ako si Daae, si Mon si Raoul, at sila ang Carlotta times two! Scary! hahahaha.

We had our girl talk over cups of coffee sa Seattle's Best (hindi nila ako mahila sa kabilang coffee shop e). You know what I've noticed? Diba when guys (I'm referring to the Straight kind) get together, they make kwento by making Pataasan ng Ihi, o Patigasan ng Titi? (this blog doesnt know the word "filter"). Gay guys do it by Pa-Fabulous-an ng Golden Clams (yup, thats what all gay guys have down there). What I mean is kung sino ang lalabas na mas maganda sa mga escapade ang panalo. Hep, hep, if you happen to be of the colorful tribe and you disagree with this, give me your number, mag meet tayo at sasampalin kita into reality. (in english: I'll slap you with the Sequined Glove of Pagpapakatotoo).

Aba syempre, si Ms. Venezuela hindi papayag na ang kanyang fabulous height ay ma put to shame. She (of course, I mean he) dropped a bombshell. She is currently dating a celebrity. And for you rumor sniffers out there, ito ang clue ko: Basta nanalo siya sa isang semi prestigious Bikini Contest. And she has photographic evidence to prove their "confessionals". Pinapabura nga ni somewhat paranoid na celeb kasi baka gawing Sex Scandal na naman ito. (Pweh! If I know, gusto nya nga yun ang mangyari. Hellooo?? Mileage!). Pero amidst all the proof she lays on the table, somehow, there is something fishy. At shempre ako naman, I preferred to keep my mouth shut about mine. Sabi nga sa book na The 48 Laws of Power by Greene, "Do not outshine the Master...at least not in front of him".

The hours passed by like silk on an inclined surface. O diba, silk talaga? Anyway, buti na lang hindi na sumama samin si Carlotta #2. Syempre, nakahinga na naman ako ng maluwag kasi meron syang ugaling, if we are gonna put it into a word it would be: suffocating. Pailalim kasi siya bumanat ng pang ookray. Kahit ako, na hindi niya pa ka-close, hindi naka iwas. Oh well, let bygones be by gones. So eto, in full rampage mode pa rin kaming tatlo. Where to go next? KTV!!! Bwahahahah. Kung may belt belt lang talaga dito mala Taekwondo, naka Black na siguro ako. (any challengers? hehe).

Mon is really one fun, spontaneous guy. Take for example, instead of the usual sing till you drop, he made us play a game na mala "Search for a Star in a Million Bazillion". Ang saya, kami ni Toshi ang contestants na nagpapatayan behind camera at siya naman...guess who? Si Zsa-zsa Manzano (ang kulet no?), at eto pa kasi diba, may scoring yung system? Yun kunwari daw yung score ng mga judges. Edi syempre patalbugan sa boses ito! At may mini intermission pa, na siya yung kakanta. Ang saya talaga! ahaha. At I'm sorry, Sheryn Regis (meaning first runner up) lang ang beauty ni Toshi, kasi naman hindi consistent ang style niya (o diba? professional?). Sa huli pinakanta kami ni Mon ng "Star in a Million". ahahha. Panalo talaga siya. He makes my heart splinter with a thousand laughters. (whoops, did I just say that out loud??)

Actually, napakahaba ng araw na to, kasi mga 7am na kami lumabas ng KTV sa Taft. Pero surprisingly, ayaw pa umuwi ni Mon (aba nakahanap din ako ng katapat!). At eto naman si Toshi, nagmaganda na gusto na daw niya umuwi. Feeling niya siguro uuwi na rin kami pag hindi namin siya kasama. Pero surprise of all surprises sinabi sakin ni Mon "Tara, Derek, tayo na lang lumabas." And I was like nonchalant on the outside when I said "Sure. Yoko pa naman umuwi e." But on the inside? Yes, my Golden Clams were once again clapping.

Ang istoryang ito ay napakahaba. Malamang kung nabasa mo to hanggang sa part na to, haggard na mata mo. Siguro sa next chapter na lang ang continuation. Mas madugo! hahaha. O siya, kita kits sa susunod na Chartreuse moon.



Nagmamahal,
Adventia (the second personality)

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